5 Things that will almost definitely happen now. Bloody obvious predictions.

So we have done it. We have thrown off the yoke of our European oppressors and have decided to withdraw to our Greatest Britain. Just so you know, this means the following will almost differently happen

The UK will break up

Scotland voted overwhelmingly to stay in the EU.

The UK is leaving the EU.

Scotland voted to remain in the UK because, among other things, they didn’t want to risk their EU membership.

There will now be another referendum and Scotland will almost certainly leave.

I am also far too tired to even attempt to explain to you why you do not kick the hornets nest that is Northern Ireland.

We will not be the “5th biggest economy in the world” 

The Leave campaign said every 30 seconds that as the 5th biggest economy in the world we can negotiate from a position of strength with other nations. When Scotland inevitably leaves this will not be the case. No shit.

Our currency will plummet

The pound is at its lowest level against the dollar in 30 years already. Lucky our economy isn’t really reliant on the financial sector…

Incidents of hate crimes against migrants will go up

Let me be clear. By migrants I mean foreigners. People who look foreign. People with foreign sounding names. Women in burkas. People called Alan because it sounds like Allah. Men with beards and anyone with the hint of a tan.

This referendum has ignited xenophobia in a way the BNP could only dream of.

Wales will regret shooting themselves in the foot (and face and nuts)

Oh Wales. What the hell have you done? You were a net beneficiary of the EU and you don’t have  migrant problem. Could it be you are just a little bit racist? I hope not.

Do you really think that a Westminster government will look out for Welsh interests more that the EU? Woops.

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